Both income and education are factors that are associated with a decreased likelihood of divorce. Of course, it is possible that some, all, none, or an interaction between these factors contribute to the slight advantage of online dating over traditional dating.

What do you think? Are there any other factors that we should consider? Catalina Toma, Ph. But who we end up becoming and how much we like that person are more in our control than we tend to think they are. Catalina Toma Ph. Virtual You. Why Is Online Dating Successful? Looking for love in all the right places? Part 2 Posted June 17, Share. About the Author.

Online: My university webpage , Facebook , Twitter. Read Next. Back Psychology Today. Back Find a Therapist. Get Help Find a Therapist Find a Treatment Center Find a Psychiatrist Find a Support Group Find Teletherapy Members Login Sign Up United States Austin, TX Brooklyn, NY Chicago, IL Denver, CO Houston, TX Los Angeles, CA New York, NY Portland, OR San Diego, CA San Francisco, CA Seattle, WA Washington, DC.

Back Get Help. Mental Health Addiction Anxiety ADHD Asperger's Autism Bipolar Disorder Chronic Pain Depression Eating Disorders. Personality Passive Aggression Personality Shyness. Personal Growth Goal Setting Happiness Positive Psychology Stopping Smoking. To ensure success among your many options, make sure you have at least a general idea of what you're looking for in a partner, and what you are offering them too. For more on those topics, see here , here , and here. Matching: Online tests may not be able to tell you your perfect match, but they can help narrow down the options.

In particular, such testing often identifies potential daters who would be a poor relationship partner for anyone. Thus, while you may have to date a few matches to find out who is a good fit for you, matching can help you avoid those who might be a disaster. Beyond that, it might be best to trust your unconscious feelings too as your implicit "gut reactions" can have a big impact on attraction. For more, see here and here. Communication: Online communication is designed to make an initial connection, not set the foundation for a whole relationship.

So, keep initial online conversation focused on finding out the basics quickly, then setting up an actual date. Generally, a few short emails or quick conversations will suffice. Long introductory emails may be counter-productive and off-putting too. Save it for a date. If you are crunched for time, then meet for coffee see here. If you still have safety concerns, meet in a public place. For more on asking for a date, see here.

Overall, it is important to remember that online dating is best used as a resource to meet individuals for eventual face-to-face dating. Keeping that goal in mind will prevent you from getting stuck on the drawbacks and limitations of dating online. So, if you get confused, the best next step is always to move an interaction toward a date. If you are overwhelmed with access to too many choices, then find a way to narrow them down and find better matches.

If you don't know what to do with a potential match, send them a quick communication. If you get frustrated with talking online, then suggest a meeting in person.

Follow that process and you will more easily find a satisfying connection online and face-to-face too. Visit AttractionDoctor. com for more dating and relationship advice in helpful categories!

Make sure you get the next post, too! Click here to sign up for my Facebook page , email , and RSS. I keep my friends informed. Jeremy Nicholson The Attraction Doctor. Previous posts from The Attraction Doctor :. Finkel, E. Online dating: A critical analysis from the perspective of psychological science. Psychological Science, 13 1 , Jeremy Nicholson, M. In addition to this, research now tells us that relationships and marriages that start online last longer and are less likely to end in divorce than those which are the result of more traditional ways of meeting.

So what are the benefits of online dating? Firstly, the number of people using online dating and the number of dating sites, means that online dating offers more of a choice of potential partners than face-to-face meetings. Secondly, some dating sites promise to match you with potential dates who meet the characteristics you are searching for.

In many cases, you may be seeking someone similar to yourself, and research has consistently shown that similarity between partners is a strong predictor of success in romantic relationships. Finally, online dating is quick and convenient. You can set up a profile and start connecting with others in minutes. Having the confidence to use online dating. If you have not used online dating before, then you may be slightly apprehensive about signing up.

So, quite simply how might you gain the confidence to go about using online dating? In simple terms, confidence is all about how we feel about our ability to do things, so how do you get to be confident at online dating? Firstly, recognise your positive features and know your worth. This is what psychologists call "mate value. Keep reminding yourself of your value, and that other people will want you because of the qualities you possess.

It happens. Have the confidence to take control and move on. After all, you have the power to control your dating profile and how you interact with others. Feeling in control is one of the key components of resilience. Remember also that there is no such thing as "the one.

In a previous post I summarized statistics showing that online dating is not only prevalent, but also slightly more successful than offline dating in producing stable i. What accounts for this success? There is no definitive research on this question, but we can certainly engage in some informed speculations. Below, I will present a list of possibilities, and look forward to your thoughts and feedback!

Dating companies such as EHarmony and OkCupid argue that their proprietary compatibility algorithms enable users to sift through undesirable matches and identify the suitable ones. EHarmony asks users to fill out extensive psychological questionnaires, many based on established personality scales. OkCupid asks quirkier questions e.

The idea that we can use reliable tests to identify appropriate partners is certainly seductive forgive the pun. However, scientific research does not support it, at least when it comes to personality compatibility.

That is, there is no evidence that extroverts are best matched with introverts , or people who are open to experience prefer others who are also open to experience.

One notable finding is that individuals high in neuroticism i. When it comes to values, attitudes, and beliefs, research supports the notion that long-term couples tend to be more similar with each other than random strangers.

However, this similarity was not shown to contribute to relationship satisfaction. As discussed in my previous post, traditional dating is based on physical proximity, with individuals choosing partners with whom they intersect frequently in everyday life, such as at work or school. This offline pool of partners is by definition restrictive. That is, individuals typically encounter relatively small numbers of potential partners from whom they can choose. Further, the diversity of these partners is limited, with, say, teachers meeting other teachers, students from a small town meeting others just like them, etc.

This issue is compounded for those looking for love later in life, when their social circles tend to be made predominantly of other couples. It can be argued that individuals can make better, more informed choices in a situation where they have lots of diverse options. Rather than choosing whomever is available in physical proximity, they may be able to be more selective and identify potential partners who meet specific criteria.

These two phenomena are not mutually exclusive. It is possible that some daters do find better matches when they have larger pools of partners, whereas others fall prey to the allure of always looking for someone better. It is possible that online daters, as a group, are different from the general population in ways that increase their likelihood of establishing successful romantic relationships.

Three dimensions of difference are worth noting. It is possible that, at this age, people possess greater self-insight i. The choices they made a decade earlier may seem less appealing once maturation has occurred. By virtue of being older, online daters may experience this problem to a lesser extent. Second, online daters are a self-selected group, who decided to invest time, energy, effort, and often money for paid sites into finding a romantic partner.

Therefore, their motivation to build satisfying relationships may be higher, leading them to be more committed towards and work harder at their relationships. By contrast, some traditional daters may stumble into relationships that they may not have specifically sought or ardently desired to begin with. Finally, research shows that online daters tend to be wealthier and more highly educated than traditional daters.

Both income and education are factors that are associated with a decreased likelihood of divorce. Of course, it is possible that some, all, none, or an interaction between these factors contribute to the slight advantage of online dating over traditional dating. What do you think? Are there any other factors that we should consider? Catalina Toma, Ph. But who we end up becoming and how much we like that person are more in our control than we tend to think they are.

Catalina Toma Ph. Virtual You. Why Is Online Dating Successful? Looking for love in all the right places? Part 2 Posted June 17, Share. About the Author. Online: My university webpage , Facebook , Twitter. Read Next. Back Psychology Today. Back Find a Therapist. Get Help Find a Therapist Find a Treatment Center Find a Psychiatrist Find a Support Group Find Teletherapy Members Login Sign Up United States Austin, TX Brooklyn, NY Chicago, IL Denver, CO Houston, TX Los Angeles, CA New York, NY Portland, OR San Diego, CA San Francisco, CA Seattle, WA Washington, DC.

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Rather than choosing whomever is available in physical proximity, they may be able to be more selective and identify potential partners who meet specific criteria. In addition, people may present differently in person or change over time. Family Life Child Development Parenting. Thus, while you may have to date a few matches to find out who is a good fit for you, matching can help you avoid those who might be a disaster. Read Next. Essential Reads. Finkel, E.

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